Cafe on Roman Road, 18th July

It’s market day on Roman Road again. Today is a mix of half-price rugs, thin summer-dresses, and tables laden with shoes. The pavements are slick after a heavy downpour.

‘Water Coming!’ shouts a man. A wave crashes from the plastic sheeting above a stall, narrowly missing those walking by. They don’t react. Another shout, water smashes and sprays on the pavement.

“Where is he? I can’t see him”, “He’s pushing up on it with a broom, see?” Two old women sitting by the cafe window don’t approve. One has candy-floss cloud of white hair, the other a streaky blonde bob. “They don’t give you no warning. Imagine you just had your hair done.”

They talk about the differences in scones from the Iceland and the Tesco -

“It lasted six days it did. I like it with jam and butter and you don’t like that. You’ve never liked that.”

“No…”

“Well that’s just the way it is! You can’t do nothing about it. You just don’t like it. Never have done.”

“I can’t have bread. I don’t have it no more. I have toast and butter on a Sunday but then in the week I don’t have bread. I have crackers. And if I don’t have crackers in, I have bread.”

“Oh I used to do Weight Watchers but I forgot it all now. I can’t be bothered. I do like a jacket potato.”

'“Oh yes. I like a jacket potato.”

***

“But where did the orange come from? I didn’t have oranges in - but there it was. You know what I think now, I think it was from a neighbour upstairs bringing down the bins and it rolled out. So there it is".”

“Ooh yes, that’s probably it.”

“Just an orange. Sitting there. I didn’t know where it come from.”

***

“He says he wants to put photos on the television for me. I said I don’t want photos on the television. If I want to see photos I can see them on the computer. But he wants to put them on the television.”

“Why?”

“Well that’s it! Why? But then he says you can do it and it’s the same as on the other thing. Well. I’m not like everybody else. I do what I want to do. You do it in your own house if you want to.”

“It’s one of those Smart TVs he must have.”

“But then you don’t know who is seeing what. Takes up all your…what do you call it… takes up your… What is it?”

“I don’t know.”

“Gigabite wotsits!”

“Oh. Yes. No you don’t want that”

***

“Right then I’ll get the bill”

“No you don’t I’ll get it.”

“No put your purse away. I’ll get it. They know me.”

“Alright then darling. I’ll get it tomorrow.”

***

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